(no subject)

today i realised that the stomache thing i used to feel when i accidentally thought about Lisa is completely gone. i honestly don't care at all anymore. not one bit. not even when i think about her +and+ other people.

nothing...

at...

all.

(she does still annoy the piss outta me, but then again, mean girls always do)

birthday card from Ral@~ my grandfather

the other day, when i was at the hospital, i picked up the birthday card from my grandfather and stashed it and left without mentioning it.

it's just that i don't want to upset him. he forgets things now, and my birthday was not something i wanted him to worry his sweet heart about.

i did look at it, though. i've been looking at it, actually.

the only handwriting in it is this:

Ralp your grandfather

...scrawled in barely-legible chicken-scratch.

he never, ever signs cards for me like that. it's always either "RJ" or, more often, "G-pa".

this means he didn't know what he was signing, or for whom. then he [somewhat suddenly] corrected (hence the unfinished "Ralph"), and wrote something different. probably on a cue from my dad, who obviously picked up the card.

i wish, for so many reasons, that my stupid birthday would have just gone away perfectly.