this post not locked

saw Hitchhiker's friday. mostly harmless great, except for most of the ending bit.

had a blowout with L over the weekend.

again.

so now she's moving out. i'm glad. we're just not good for each other anymore. i'm not faultless, not by a longshot. but i certainly didn't deserve some of what she was brewin up. and can you believe that after a year and a half together, she still vehemently insists that she does not love me?

and, in the end, i just don't trust her like i thought i did. i mean, ultimately, i DO trust her, but she wasn't as open with me about some things (a few recent locked journal posts have me raising an eyebrow, plus mythical "non-public" photos from RHPS a couple weeks ago, when she didn't come home until a full day later) as i could have hoped. i'm all for privacy; i need more myself. but i'm as open as a book about as much as i can possibly be. personal space is a great thing, but i can't help wanting to know what's going on. i'm certain that it's nothing but hurtful words and some *vaguely* compromising pics. but i value openness just as much as privacy. it's not hard to fit these things together.

so there's that. i'm ok. bah, i'm being stoic. it's working pretty good.

my car's in the garage. i'll get it back soon. SOOOOOON. drool.

and my finger's gonna be fixed in a coupla weeks. i'm feeling renewed.